Beyond Direct Cremation
Why ceremony still matters — even when you choose direct cremation
“Just cremate me, no fuss.”
It's something many of us have said or heard. It sounds simple, even sensible. And for families under financial pressure, it may feel like the only option.
But what happens when our people die — and there’s no goodbye? No gathering, no stories, no shared tears, no moment to pause and remember?
This is the quiet cost of No Service, Direct Cremation — and it’s one we don’t talk about enough.
It's something many of us have said or heard. It sounds simple, even sensible. And for families under financial pressure, it may feel like the only option.
But what happens when our people die — and there’s no goodbye? No gathering, no stories, no shared tears, no moment to pause and remember?
This is the quiet cost of No Service, Direct Cremation — and it’s one we don’t talk about enough.
What is Direct Cremation No Service (DCNS)?
Direct cremation means the person is cremated without a ceremony beforehand. No mourners are present. The ashes are returned to the family, and that’s it.
Companies like Bare and Willed now promote this as a modern, affordable, “no fuss” option — especially appealing to those experiencing funeral poverty.
And while it does reduce costs, it also removes something we all need:
Direct cremation means the person is cremated without a ceremony beforehand. No mourners are present. The ashes are returned to the family, and that’s it.
Companies like Bare and Willed now promote this as a modern, affordable, “no fuss” option — especially appealing to those experiencing funeral poverty.
And while it does reduce costs, it also removes something we all need:
- A chance to say goodbye.
- A space to feel and honour our grief.
- A moment to witness a life and mark its passing.
Grief Isn’t “Fuss” — It’s Love
Choosing “no service” doesn’t mean grief goes away. It just means grief has nowhere to go.
Rituals — even simple ones — give us a structure for mourning. They help us begin to accept what’s happened. They help families come together. They support healing.
Without some kind of ceremony, grief can be delayed, isolated, or even made more difficult.
Research shows that involvement in rituals, even informal ones, leads to better emotional outcomes.
Grief needs a threshold — a place to begin.
Choosing “no service” doesn’t mean grief goes away. It just means grief has nowhere to go.
Rituals — even simple ones — give us a structure for mourning. They help us begin to accept what’s happened. They help families come together. They support healing.
Without some kind of ceremony, grief can be delayed, isolated, or even made more difficult.
Research shows that involvement in rituals, even informal ones, leads to better emotional outcomes.
Grief needs a threshold — a place to begin.
There’s Another Way: Family-Led Farewells
If traditional funerals feel too expensive or impersonal, there is a meaningful and affordable alternative:
Home funerals and family-led ceremonies
These may include:
You don’t need to spend thousands.
You don’t need a chapel or a hearse.
You just need a moment. A gesture. A space to feel.
As a celebrant, I can work with you to create something:
If traditional funerals feel too expensive or impersonal, there is a meaningful and affordable alternative:
Home funerals and family-led ceremonies
These may include:
- Sitting with your person at home
- A small private vigil with candles, music, stories, and photos
- A farewell ritual before cremation or burial
- A simple memorial or ashes ceremony later
You don’t need to spend thousands.
You don’t need a chapel or a hearse.
You just need a moment. A gesture. A space to feel.
As a celebrant, I can work with you to create something:
- Personal (not scripted or generic)
- Affordable (pay only for what you need)
- Supportive (for both grief and logistics)
“I thought I didn’t need a funeral…”
Many families who skip ceremony later say:
“It just didn’t feel real.”
“We felt like we didn’t get to say goodbye.”
“I wish we’d done something — even something small.”
Many families who skip ceremony later say:
“It just didn’t feel real.”
“We felt like we didn’t get to say goodbye.”
“I wish we’d done something — even something small.”
You don’t need a funeral to have a ceremony.
You don’t need a crowd to feel connected.
You don’t need to follow tradition to honour someone with meaning.
You don’t need a crowd to feel connected.
You don’t need to follow tradition to honour someone with meaning.
Let’s Create Something Simple that Matters
Whether you’ve already arranged a direct cremation or you’re trying to make plans now, I can help you create a ceremony that works for you, your person, your values, and your budget.
It could be:
You don’t have to do nothing.
You don’t have to do it alone.
Whether you’ve already arranged a direct cremation or you’re trying to make plans now, I can help you create a ceremony that works for you, your person, your values, and your budget.
It could be:
- A home-based farewell
- A gentle ritual before cremation
- A memorial weeks or months later
- A personalised ceremony you can lead yourselves
You don’t have to do nothing.
You don’t have to do it alone.
Ready to explore your options?
Let’s have a conversation.
Reach out any time to ask questions, talk through ideas, or find a way forward that feels right.
Call Me or Email Karen
Want to learn more?
Download my free guide:
“A Gentle Goodbye: Creative Ceremonies After Direct Cremation”
(Coming soon)
Let’s have a conversation.
Reach out any time to ask questions, talk through ideas, or find a way forward that feels right.
Call Me or Email Karen
Want to learn more?
Download my free guide:
“A Gentle Goodbye: Creative Ceremonies After Direct Cremation”
(Coming soon)
“Grief and love are sisters, woven together from the beginning.
Their kinship reminds us that there is no love that does not contain loss,
and no loss that is not a reminder of the depth of our love.”
From The Wild Edge of Sorrow
by Francis Weller
Their kinship reminds us that there is no love that does not contain loss,
and no loss that is not a reminder of the depth of our love.”
From The Wild Edge of Sorrow
by Francis Weller
sincere ceremonies
