Daring to Drop the 'D' Word...

Why Deflecting 'Death' Does More Damage than Good

Death. Not "passed away," not "departed," not "gone to a better place." Just death. It's direct, it's definitive, and it's high time we stop dressing it up with delicate euphemisms. While it might seem considerate to soften the blow, research reveals that such linguistic detours can lead to misunderstandings, emotional confusion, and even hinder the grieving process.

The Detriments of Dodging Directness

A study published in JAMA Network Open found that in critical care conversations, the words die, death, dying, or stillborn were rarely used, with alternatives taking their place 92% of the time. This avoidance can cloud the reality of the situation, leaving families unprepared for the inevitable.

Some Theologica noted that while terms like "passed away" may seem gentler, they can inadvertently minimise the gravity of loss, making it harder for individuals to process their grief. In a world where life-and-death challenges shape our reality, we must speak openly and honestly about them, with integrity and hope.

Dabbling in Dubious Diction

​Monty Python’s famous Dead Parrot Sketch gives us an hilarious example of the range of ways we avoid using the ‘D’ Word: demised, passed on, is no more, ceased to be, expired, gone to meet one’s maker, late, bereft of life, rests in peace, pushing up the daisies, shuffled off this mortal coil, run down the curtain, and joined the choir invisible! And then there’s kicked the bucket, departed, deceased, lost, no longer with us, gave up the ghost, in a better place, gone home, transitioned (a more recent term) and the most common of all passed away.

The Case for Candour

Dr. Kathryn Inskeep emphasises the importance of confronting death head-on, stating that avoiding the topic can lead to a lack of preparedness and understanding.

A poll by Marie Curie revealed over 50 different euphemisms for death, highlighting society's discomfort with the subject. Yet, this linguistic tiptoeing can prevent meaningful conversations about end-of-life wishes and the grieving process.

Ditching the Disguises

By embracing clear, direct language about death, we also foster death literacy: the understanding and skills needed to engage with dying, death, and grief in a meaningful way. When we avoid the reality of death, we risk leaving ourselves and others unprepared, both emotionally and practically.

The concept of memento mori, Latin for "remember you must die," has long served as a reminder of mortality, not to instil fear, but to encourage a life lived with awareness and intention. By naming death for what it is, we reclaim our ability to prepare, to grieve, and to find meaning - without illusion or avoidance. So, let's be brave, be bold, and call death what it is. After all, in the grand dictionary of life, "death" is just another word and saying it aloud won’t kill you!!

Favourite euphemisms for 'death'

I'd love to hear about your absolute favourite euphemism for 'death'. Is it unusual, funny or just downright shocking? Please share it in the comments below.

I’m here to help and will respond to every comment.

References
https://jamanetwork.com/journals/jamanetworkopen/fullarticle/2797037
https://sometheologica.com/reflection/nobody-dies-anymore-euphemisms-and-death/
https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x1s7gko
https://www.sit.edu/story/beyond-euphemisms-and-metaphors-dr-kathryn-inskeep-on-ihp-death-dying/
https://www.mariecurie.org.uk/media/press-releases/poll-reveals-over-50-different-euphemisms-for-death/262947